By Fried Motherboard
“Aaah, hii lazima tubadilishe motherboard,” he said as he looked straight into my eyes. This dark, well-dressed silhouette of a man was now telling me that my two-week-old laptop was irredeemable since I had “fried” the motherboard – whatever that meant at that time.
It’s not every day you get to damage a laptop, whether it’s water damage or breaking the display or some other weird thing that you can’t really explain.
Back in 2012, I was new to the world of technology. Actually, I had just gotten my very first laptop a Compaq something-something, can’t really remember the details all I remember is that I was excited.
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So on one fateful afternoon, coming out of my ICDL class (you better not be laughing right now), my Compaq laptop refused to go on and it refused to charge as well. Boom – boom – nope, that’s not me hitting my laptop, that’s my terrible heartbeat impression.
In my panic mode, I got the great idea of walking along Moi Avenue in search of a repair shop to, well you know, fix my laptop. And I did, find a fundi the part of fixing the laptop is coming up shortly.
So after I told this guy my problems, he took my laptop, told me to give him like an hour and crawled into a den which was hidden from the view of customers. At this point, I am so desperate to give my baby life again that I don’t find this suspicious at all.
Do you know how long an hour is? 60 minutes, 3600 seconds friggin seconds, FOREVER. Anyway, they elapsed. Mimi huyo, back to the shop.
“Umemaliza?”
“Eeeh. Hii lazima tubadilishe motherboard.
“Eti? Na hiyo ni how much?”
“Hata sina sahii, lazima nikutafutie. Check baadaye”
At this point, I am confused and devastated. My laptop was basically done.
*Light bulb* Another great idea. I decided since I had just bought the laptop, I should return it and ask for a refund because no way that motherboard-thingy was my fault.
I called the guy who sold me the laptop, who happened to be my ICDL instructor. He asked why I didn’t take it to him in the first place and after close inspection, he concluded that my motherboard had been swapped.
To cut the long story short, these two people knew each other. We found out after I took my ICDL instructor to the repair shop. After a short while – definitely shorter than the 1-hour I had to wait earlier my laptop issues had been resolved and the problem? Well, it was just a minor charging port issue.
– Saruni Maina
Fundi wa simu
Do you remember how you felt when you got your very first smartphone? How it was just love at first sight and you couldn’t spend even a minute without pressing that power button? It didn’t even matter whether someone had sent you a message or not.
Well, imagine being that excited that you even set up a password that you cannot seem to recall at all on the next day. And before you fall down laughing at me, yes, I did try a million times to remember it. Nothing came to mind, in short.
Luckily I did find myself in a shady tiny workshop around Koja after a couple of recommendations from friends. The guy in a sweaty khaki shirt was quick to accept the task. “Ah hii kujia kesho jioni utapata iko sawa. Si kazi kubwa sana.”
Having back my new Itel phone was all I wanted and nothing was going to stand in my way. Not even the fact that the dude just dared to mention Kes.3,000 as the charge to a fresh high school finisher.
If only I knew that Google was my friend back then, I would have never dreamt of even stepping out off the house to search for a so-called “fundi wa simu”. Seeing the phone light up and just work normally was so relaxing and pleasing that I never even minded the millions of scratches that were never there on the previous day.
It’s only that I got home to realise that the rear camera was previewing and capturing images up-side-down. To this day, I don’t know how that was possible.
I eventually was forced to actually go to the authorised repair centre, have the phone fixed… again and pay some extra doh! Apparently, the “expert” had switched the camera, installed the fake one badly so I could go back for him to rip me off some extra KES 3,000 or maybe even more.
Hii Nairobi jo!
-Dennis Waweru
The Student Becomes The Master: ADELE Version
My story is a little different. It’ about 7 P.M. I was conquering the streets with my new college laptop bag. I felt hip. I felt cool. I was on top of the world so to speak.
I get to town, hold it tight and get into a matatu. Nothing’s going to happen to Adele (That’s the name of my Dell Laptop. Get it? Okay). I alight the Matatu and as I’m about to cross the road to go home, a Nduthi guy rams right through me. I’m dazed, I’m spiralling. I can’t tell what’s up or down. Someone comes to help me up as he’s shouting at the nduthi guy who sped off, seemingly undisturbed.
My mind is in sixes and sevens and all I can think off are my limbs. Luckily I manage to stand up and I can still wiggle my fingers and my toes. My hand broke my fall and I’m in serious pain but I’m happy I can walk.
Then it hits me! ADELE! I’m too afraid to look into the bag. Mainly cause I don’t want to accept my fate and also I don’t want people to know the kind of ‘expensivities’ I have in my bag. Plus, that whole ooh aki pole! Woi ngai ingekuwa laptop yangu! Wah sasa utaduu? – that Kenyans pull, I wasn’t ready for.
So I walk home fighting tears. I get to the house and I take it out of the bag. Adele is dying. Her screen is totally messed up. The multi-coloured with black patches screen of death is staring me in my face. Adele saved my life. I know there’s not a lot of time to keep her alive so I plan to go to the store tomorrow. I must save hers too.
I’m up early and I rush Adele to the clinic. The doctor (fundi) has a grim look on his face. He sighs, inspects the damage and says…
“Hii boss itakuwa karibu 30k lazima nireplace casing na screen, ata lazima nitoe hard disk! Hii imeenda kabisa. Naujue hizi vitu hazipatikani Kenya. Bei inaeza panda.”
I sit there on those tiny stools they have and my mind can’t fathom that price. He realizes this and to confirm, he asks another guy, “Ona hii. Si hii ni pesa mingi kutengeneza“. The guy, right on cue says, “Ehhh ata 40k.” I tell him to give it to me I’ll bring it back with money tomorrow.
I get home and as I’m wondering how and where I’ll get the money, I start to Google where these parts are found and to my surprise, all these parts are found in Kenya. The hard disk and screen would only cost me 12k. The rest was a YouTube video away. So that’s what I did. I bought a new screen and Hard disk, got a professional to fix them for me and it only cost me half the price he was talking about.
The lesson of the day Kids, Nairobi is not a safe place. Always, always and I can’t stress this enough, Google, YouTube or ask a professional “@GadgetsAfrica” about these things before you get scammed off all of your money.
–Anfernee Onamu
What’s you Nairobi electronics fundi tale?
Read This: Twisted Tales: How Kenyans Get Conned By Electronic Shops Along Luthuli Avenue
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